A smart person learns a lot from failure, the alternative is bad. There is no point in blaming others when you fail (T. Boone Pickens, R.I.P.). Remember where you came from and what you learned to get you to the place you are today.
What have you learned and why? Life is about alternatives and each selection means that you did not choose something else. Recently a colleague asked me about her long-distance relationship. She is successful, he is also successful and after several years they want to take the relationship to the next step: living in the same city. The offer on the table was that she would move to the city that he resides. She asked what I would do, knee jerk I said do not move.
She must make what is likely one of the most important decisions in her life thus far, leave the home base to join with a potential partner in life. What if the partner in life is not the ‘right’ person and this is a failure? Maybe the change will create another opportunity for her. Who knows?
The point is simple, decide and never look back. If she moves and it turns out poorly, hindsight would have been an easy answer. Looking back is both good and bad.
Good – you learn from your failures.
Bad – you dwell on your failures.
I was lucky, I picked my wife (she would likely say that she picked me) and it has been a great marriage. However, there are limitations. Your spouse can be supportive to the extent it is no longer impactful. I suspect that most everyone to some respect needs to have a sense of security and belonging. Typically, your wife or significant other can fulfill this need.
My point is to dive deep into the root of the failure. What were the conditions that resulted in the failure? What did you specifically do to help or hurt these conditions? When you downloaded the events and messages from your cohorts, what went wrong?
Learning comes in all forms, for me, learning from failure is difficult and perhaps the most important lesson in life. Dissecting what went wrong and why is an exercise in self-reflection and possibly the most difficult thing to do as a human being. Good luck!